All things…Episcopal

All Things Episcopal is a podcast designed with young people in mind

>> Clare: Hello, everyone. Welcome to All Things Episcopal, where we talk about anything and everything related to the Episcopal Church. This podcast was designed with young people in mind and as a space to learn more about the Christian faith with the Episcopal lens. So in traditionally Episcopalian greeting fashion, the Lord be with you.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Foreign.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Hello friends, and welcome to the newest episode of All Things Episcopal. Holy and human stories from young adults in the pews. This is Karen Schleybaugh, your co host, and I'm also joined by co host Claire Sternberbano. Hi, Claire.

>> Clare: What's up, friends?

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Uh, today we have Hannah Connelly, a junior at the University of Kansas majoring in early childhood education, and Kaylee McDonne, a sophomore at the University of Kansas majoring in behavioral neuroscience. Hannah and Kayleigh are both peer ministers and residents at the Canterbury House of Lawrence. So welcome Hannah and Kayleigh.

>> Clare: And the crowd goes wild. Woo.

>> Hannah Connelly: Hi y'.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Uh all.

>> Hannah Connelly: Thanks for having us on.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Uh, we're gonna go ahead and get started and jump in with our questions talking about your personal faith journey.

Hannah and Kayleigh grew up in the Episcopal Church

Um, so we'll start off with Hannah. How did you first get connected to the Episcopal Church?

>> Hannah Connelly: I have been Episcopalian for quite some time. I was baptized in a Presbyterian Lutheran church, but my family left that environment when I was pretty young, um, and we church hopped for a while. I have memories of just being in all sorts of different children's church environments and kind of getting a feel of different churches. But we landed in the Episcopal Church at St. Thomas at the Apostle in Overland park when I was in around third grade. So I was able to. Everything that I remember is in the Episcopal Church. And I was able to grow up with most of their children's and youth formation, which was just so important for me. So that is how I have found myself in the Episcopal Church and continuing to be so even as a young adult.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Kayleigh, what about you?

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I grew up in the Episcopal Church. I was baptized as a baby in the Episcopal Church. Ever since. Yeah, since I was. Before I was born. My family has been a part of the same church for over 24 years now in St. Louis, the Church of St. Michael and St. George. And ever since then I've just been going to the Episcopal Church. I've changed churches a few times, been in between Catholic and different denominations, but mostly just the Episcopal Church.

>> Clare: I love that the trend continues with the Canterbury students, even though they're in different schools, that they have this rich history with the Episcopal Church and that they decide to stay in the Episcopal Church. I think that's that's such a wonderful thing and a gift to the Canterbury communities and the church at large.

What drew Hannah and Kayleigh to stay involved in the church

With that being said, what drew you both to stay involved or come back if you ever had a moment of. No, I'm not sure if this is really my jam or flavor of church. So Hannah, let's start with you and then we'll follow up with Kayleigh.

>> Hannah Connelly: What drew me into the church and staying and making it my own was how I felt so empowered as a youth. Um, I felt as if the church, both my local parish and the uh, Diocese of Kansas as a whole really saw something in me that I didn't see within myself. This, like leadership, this spiritual being that and everybody, every adult that I came in contact really helped me grow and kind of become my own person and grow into myself in such a meaningful and faith based way. That was really important to me, um, as a youth. It gave me this purpose to do justice and to bring people in and to kind of find peace and share uh, God's love with others. So I've never had a big moment where I strayed away from the church, not in a huge way. But having that kind of rock throughout my formative years was really important and it has just made it a natural thing for me to keep coming back to an adulthood that I know that I can count on the church and Jesus as a being. So.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Yeah.

>> Clare: And Kayleigh, what about you?

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Yeah, so for me, I mean, m. I uh, went. Fell away from the Episcopal Church for a while. Like in middle school. Up until my junior year of high school, I, I didn't really go to church. Um, and then I was invited to a non denominational church and I was like, wait, I really miss my church at home. Um, and so I went back to church and I started getting involved in more things at my church with mission trips and youth retreats. And that's when I found God again is I was in New York and we were getting our, uh, we were on a mission trip and we do this thing at the end of the week where your youth group leader washes your feet. And that's when I was just like, wow. Like I just felt God in such a powerful way in that moment. And so ever since then I've just given my life to God.

>> Clare: I so, so love that. Um, on, on such a very deep level. Um, I'm really glad that you found your way home.

Kayleigh describes how her faith has changed over time

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): I mean you kind of were talking about this, but, um, so I'm going to continue with you, Kayleigh, and just ask like, how would you Describe that your faith has changed or evolved over time.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Um. Um, my faith has definitely changed from just going through the ritual of church, you know, just going to church, doing the thing, and going home, you know, and not thinking about it until the next Sunday. And now it's just. It's involved in my everyday life. Anytime, like, there's a car crash, I. I find myself doing the sign of the cross because I'm praying for those people. And, um, anytime I'm stressed or anxious or mad at someone, I find myself praying every day. And I find myself less stressed. I find myself, you know, more calm and collected, and I can think fully. Um, and I think that's the biggest difference. How my faith has changed is the fact that I actually have faith now. I have. Instead of just going through the ritual every day.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Yeah, it's. I mean, it sounds like you're talking about, you know, more of a relationship than.

>> Clare: Yeah.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Something else. That's cool, Hannah.

>> Hannah Connelly: Um, my faith, really, I have always liked, you know, believed in God in a way that an adolescent or like a child does when that's all they've grown up with. And I was just like, yep, there's God. Like, that's my. That's my man. But, like, I'm not gonna really think about that because, you know, that's just how it is. But When I was 18, I went through a very dramatic life shift and a very, very, very hard time. And I found myself really praying for the first time in my life and really sitting with God. And I remember kind of bargaining with God, trying to. Trying to make things go my way. Um, and I remember saying, like, oh, if you do this thing for me, then I will, you know, try. I will devote my life to, like, becoming a children's minister or a children's youth minister. And in that moment, I felt this peace that I had not felt in months at this point. And I felt God's love kind of wash over me. And, no, I didn't get what I wanted because that wasn't, uh, good for me at the time. But what I did get was a relationship with God that was my own in my own way. And I could feel God there for me in such a meaningful way. And ever since then, that is when I was freshly 18, is when I started making my faith my own and going to church because I wanted to, and studying scripture and thinking about it critically in a way that was my own and not what was just presented to me, like, told me what to think. That's when I started to have My own personal relationship with the church and Jesus. So that was. Ever since then, I've tried to have my own relationship with God. And that's kind of how it's changed from, you know, just something I was told, how to believe, what to believe to. This is mine. This has had an impact, uh, on my life. And I want to continue to give back to that.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Yeah.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): It's so funny how sometimes the things we pray for later, you know, several years later, we can look back and be like, why was I praying for that?

>> Hannah Connelly: Exactly.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Which. Which is a great, like, response from God too, to, To. To have gotten over that and not, you know, and. And realized, you know, what is really important or what the heck or whatever.

>> Clare: Yeah, so true. Because, Karen, at one point, weren't you discerning to, um, go into the medical field, like when you were.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Oh, yeah.

>> Clare: I mean, like, didn't you.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): I was gonna become a doctor. I was gonna go get my PhD.

>> Hannah Connelly: And all the things.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): There's been a lot of different things in my life. Yeah.

>> Clare: And I think that's one of the beauties of God is, um, the graciousness that is given to us. And, uh, one of the things that I love hearing from both of you is you've allowed that graciousness and love to permeate your entire being. Not just in acts, but in your entire being. And to me, that is the beautiful witness, especially in campus ministry.

Both of you have found a home in the Episcopal Church

Both of you had mentioned earlier that you have spent time in different denominations. Hannah, you said that you were baptized in a, uh, Presbyterian, Lutheran kind of context. And then, Kaylee, you had mentioned that you had spent a hot minute in the Roman Catholic Church, as well as a hot minute in a non denom church. But you both have found a home in the Episcopal Church. I'm curious if you can tell us a little bit more about what it means for you to identify as an Episcopalian within the Christian faith, how that has shaped your life. So, Hannah, we'll go with you and then follow up with Kayleigh.

>> Hannah Connelly: I feel like our church does a really good job at putting love first, love for the community, love for each other, creation, the world, the church, etc. Um, and this is why I have felt a home, um, in the church. Because I have just always, no matter where I have been in the Episcopal setting, I have always felt overwhelming love, God's love, love from others, all that. And I. I try to lead with love in my life. And I feel like it's just a place where I really find comfort and safety. So that's that's my personal experience. And why I keep coming back to this church is just because it has been such a safe blanket for me throughout all phases of my life.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Uh, for me personally, I have. I mean I can find God really anywhere I go. It doesn't matter church, it doesn't matter anything like that. I just wanted a community mostly and like, I've also been to a Lutheran church and many other types of churches. But I, I do think.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): How I.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Grew up also plays a big factor into me being an Episcopalian, considering I would go every single weekend to an Episcopal church. I think it's. I find more comfort in the Episcopal Church than any other church. And they def. It's just like there is a lot more love I've found in the Episcopal Church. There's love in all the churches that I've been to just in a different way. And I do like that the Episcopal, uh, church is more accepting and just loving overall in a sense.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Kind of along with that.

Are there any like Episcopal beliefs or practices that really resonate with you

Are there any like Episcopal beliefs or practices that really resonate with you?

>> Hannah Connelly: I, uh, feel like the Episcopal Church does a very great aspect of doing, doing what they long to see in the world and enacting the justice part of our faith, especially in the church that I grew up in that was kind of the center of our curriculum was love, mercy, do justice, walk humbly with God. Many Episcopalians I know make the change that they want to see in the world. And I just, I find that very awesome and very cool. That is just a very hands on faith. And it's um, in my experience where you're hands on, working on your faith, but you're also hands on enacting, doing the gospel. So that's the part of the Episcopal faith that I feel most connected to.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Nice.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): M. What about you, Kayleigh? Do you have any Episcopal beliefs or practices that you especially love? It's okay if you don't.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I mean, not necessarily because there's aspects of all the churches that I've been to that I really love. And I don't think there's one thing that I can just like pull out and be like, oh, I like this more or you know, or. I mean I definitely do resonate with the family like connection that I've had in the Episcopal Church. And I think that's a beautiful thing because anyone can come from anywhere and believe anything and they have a place in the Episcopal Church.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): I mean, I would say for you, something that we've talked about recently was just that you really prefer the more like high church formal, you know, the liturgy. And, um, and some of that, like, really helps you feel worshipful. And so, like, that's something I. That I just have noticed you talk about. That resonates with you.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Yes, that definitely does resonate with me heavily. So, yeah.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Which is great because as your chaplain, I am a low church person. So m. For you to say, Kayleigh.

>> Clare: You'Re giving us reason to do a pulpit squab at some point because I'm much more of a high church person. I literally wrote to someone the other day that I will still come to the late service on Christmas Eve because there's going to be incense and I will show up just for the incense, not because I'm involved in the service. I see you, I hear you. I affirm your love for high church.

How would you explain the Episcopal denomination to someone who doesn't know

So, um, one of the things that I've heard you both kind of talk about a little bit in relation to, um, coming from various points, different denominations, but also a re. Entry point into the Episcopal Church. If you were to come across someone at say, like a campus. Campus event or, um, a friend of yours is interested in coming to church, how would you explain the Episcopal denomination to them? Um, to someone who doesn't know about the Episcopal Church, what do you think they should know?

>> Hannah Connelly: When I describe the Episcopal Church, I really try to emphasize the welcoming nature of our church, along with our liturgy and our emphasis on tradition, which is very important to me personally as another high church advocate lover. Um, and our effort to love and follow Jesus as closely as we can as humans in these modern times. Those are kind of the main points. Whenever I explain the Episcopal Church, uh, sometimes I do, um, have trouble to not just, you know, boil it down to, we welcome all and we're so affirming, and you should come because of those things, because you'd be welcome here. I do struggle with, you know, hitting the other broad points as well, but I feel like those are the three main things that I like to explain whenever I'm like, I'm an Episcopalian. Have you ever heard of that? Like, I always hit it with the. Have you. Have you ever heard of that? Because it's. It's just not. It's just not very out there, I feel. But, yeah, that's what I have.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I personally, uh, when I talk about the Episcopal Church, I kind of just go straight with the facts at first, where we came from, like the history of our church and all that fun stuff and. But it's the person's kind of just like wanting to know a Little bit about it. I just kind of compare it to the Catholic Church a lot because it, it's very, very similar. Okay. Um, it's very similar to the Catholic Church and I'll explain that. It's just we have different sets of beliefs. Mhm.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Yeah. Yeah. I think this is the problem with having gone to seminary is that when people ask me about the Episcopal Church, like, I want to go into like, well, we're both Protestant and Catholic and like, explain all this stuff and like, it just makes it way too complicated for anybody to really care what I'm saying anymore at that point.

>> Clare: A thousand times, yes. A thousand times, yes. Because you want everyone to know and love the Episcopal Church. Like I'm going to use the scary E word that Episcopalians avoid. You want to evangelize about the Episcopal Church because of how awesome it is.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Let's talk about via media and. No, too much. You guys have much better approach.

Do you have a favorite part of the Episcopal liturgy and worship service

Um, so we do have a very beautiful. And worship service. Um, do you, you have a favorite part of the Episcopal liturgy and worship service or like a favorite type of service? Because we've done some different ones.

>> Hannah Connelly: Um, my favorite part of any Episcopal worship. Well, I love the liturgy and I love that that is something that is the same and repetitive and kind of meditative in a way because it's something that you can keep coming back to. And is so growing up in the church so ingrained in me and in my heart. Like if I, I find myself sometimes just like saying random prayers to myself that I don't even know why I'm saying that at that time, but it popped in my head. So here's the post communion prayer. But um, my favorite part of the service, uh, as a whole is the Eucharist. Um, the Eucharist is something that I've always kind of struggled to understand. I feel like it is so broad and this is the body and blood of Christ. But what it like why am I doing that? But I do recognize the importance and I do feel the spirit when I take it. And um, it is my fave to kind of feel God with me in that, in that very tangible way. I feel like I really. I love the sacraments and I love having something to turn to that can be very tangible at different times of my life. And having the Eucharist and having that moment with God in a very intimate way. That's my favorite part that I get to do that every single week in the service.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): And just a note for our listeners that our. The episode that's coming out right before this one is all about the Eucharist. So if you haven't listened to the episode right before this one yet, you can go and hear all about the mystery and wonder and beauty of the Episcopal Eucharist service.

>> Hannah Connelly: I'll, uh, need to check that one out then.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Yeah. What about you, Kayleigh? Do you have a favorite part of the Episcopal worship service?

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Yeah, definitely. My favorite part has to just be the hymns in general. I think they're so beautiful, especially if there's an organ playing. Sometimes my church at home will have a harp on Christmas Eve with a trumpet. Ah. As well. And it is the most beautiful service I've ever been to. Midnight Mass at my church is so gorgeous. They, uh, have the incense they like. I don't think I have a favorite part of the worship service because I just love the worship service together. But I do have a favorite service which is Midnight Mass. You know, uh, we dim the lights, we sing Silent Night, and it's just so beautiful. And for two hours before they have a harpist playing along with the organist or like, yeah, our organist playing. And it's just so beautiful. My family and I always show up early to hear it and I just love it.

>> Clare: I love a good midnight mess. Absolutely love it. I think the first.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): I'm trying to remember who's not Episcopalian. When we're talking about midnight Mass, what we really mean is like Christmas Eve, a service that happens fairly late in the day, it doesn't necessarily always start at midnight.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: True.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): And that's really the only time of year that we have a midnight Mass is Christmas Eve. Yeah, I just, you know, if, if someone's not familiar. Just wanted to explain.

>> Clare: No, I, I love that you took that moment to explain that because again, kind of what you were saying earlier about, you know, having gone to seminary, you want to tell people all the things and then you forget, like the most significant thing, which is make it accessible. So, um, to Kayleigh's point, absolutely love a good Midnight Mass. I think that was my first high church service that I can actively recall as, as a 9 or 10 year old, maybe even 8. Yeah. Definitely the incense, definitely the candles, all the things.

How do you connect or even struggle to connect with the liturgy or hymns

So you all kind of touched on this a little bit in your previous answer, but I want to kind of dive a little bit deeper. How do you connect or even struggle to connect with the liturgy, sacraments, or traditions of the church? Where is there like a, uh, wondering, or you're just like, outright, uh, I don't know about this. Or you're just Absolutely in love with something. Hannah, let's start with you.

>> Hannah Connelly: Perfect. I really connect with the high church nature of the Episcopal Church. It feels like we are giving glory to God in a way that feels most appropriate and meaningful to me. This is like a being who loves us so tremendously, and, uh, we are able to kind of worship him in a way that feels the most, I don't know, goreful? I don't. Yeah, that's what I'll say. But I do sometimes struggle to connect with the music. And I know that that might be a hot take on this podcast, but I struggle a little bit to connect with some of the hymns or to feel. Cause like, at camp, growing up, or at, uh, youth events as a whole, we have such the lively music and I could really feel God's spirit within that. And, uh, sometimes I just kind of long for more of that and more of an outward worship in songs that I don't personally feel in the hymns. And I struggle to connect there personally, but I just, I love the high church nature. And with the high church nature comes hymn. So it's kind of like a, it's like a back and forth in my mind, but that's where I connect most.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): I love a music director who's trying to introduce us to new music, but it can be pretty brutal if the congregation doesn't know the song very well.

>> Clare: This is true. But also, Hannah, I love your answer about wanting a more contemporary, high energy vibe while also having a love for high church and the reverence for it. That is a very Episcopal answer. The yes and the yes. And so anyways, Kaylee, what about you?

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I'm gonna, I'm gonna have to disagree with Hannah on here. I know, like, we probably grew up very differently with, um, our churches. Uh, but at my church, the hymns, they, they, they go, they go kind of hard. Okay. Like, they do. Um, you know, everyone in the church is singing. Everyone has their, their hymn, uh, hymnals out. And everyone in my church is singing. And like, I think the most beautiful part is the hymns because, like, recently, over the summer, there's this couple, um, and his husband passed away this summer. And my dad, he goes up to him and he was like, I just love coming to church every Sunday and hearing you sing, you and your husband sing, it was just so beautiful. And he turned around and he goes every single Sunday. I love hearing you sing too. Like, I can see the love you have with your wife when you sing with her to these services. And it's just so beautiful. Like, uh, uh, it just connects people so heavily. Music is one of the most beautiful things that has ever come out of this. Like, come out of this. And um, I like my time in church to be very like traditional, very high holy and going just like straight for, I don't know, very traditional. And then I love it when I do have youth events or stuff like that to like mess around and get kids engaged in a different way. Because that's also a really beautiful part. But I just love hymns so much.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Oh, uh, I love that you guys didn't agree totally on that because it just demonstrates the variety and depth and the like. Also that like, different churches can have different, you know, strength points. And so, I mean, it sounds like at Kaylee's, uh, home church, they're really one of their strong gifts is music and hymns and, and that's awesome.

>> Clare: And so anyway, that disagreement, if we can call it a disagreement.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Right.

>> Clare: Well, differing of opinion.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Yeah, that's what I meant.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Yeah.

>> Clare: Not totally Episcopalian, which I'm so here for, because we're normally pretty agreeable people. So I absolutely love that last, last.

Question about the worship and the liturgy. Is there a specific moment during a worship service that feels especially meaningful

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Question about the worship and the liturgy. Is there a specific moment during a, uh, worship service that feels especially meaningful?

>> Hannah Connelly: So I'm not going to talk about like a moment in a specific service or whatever, but what is most meaningful to me are those special services that we have during holy times or. Well, yeah, during holy times like Christmas Eve or Maundy Thursday is my absolute favorite service all year long as such a beautiful service to go to where I really feel the weight of what Jesus did for us, um, in a way that I think is hard to fully comprehend. But being at that service and at Good Friday service the following day, I am able to really sit with it and for it to impact me, um, in a way for to feel the emotions of the service. And to also be at church during a non Sunday time is also just something that I love because it is hard to always make time. I struggle with making time for my faith in my day to day life. That's something that I've been grappling with recently. But during a holy time where there's a service that I could go to, it's a lot easier for me and I am able to put my faith first. That's, that's very, uh, meaningful to me. Is that Maundy Thursday, Easter vigil, Good Friday, Christmas Eve, all that is just my favorite time of year, times of year.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Thanks.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): What about you, Kayleigh?

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I mean, during service I just really love just the whole Tradition and how everything's the same every time. And I don't know, I don't think anything is especially meaningful. I mean, I do have, like, every time I am at my church with my dad, um, there it's just like a little thing he does, but he always like, lets all of us out first and stands behind us. And I just think it's, it's just a cute thing that he does. And I love it because it's just become a tradition that every single time we go up to receive communion, he does that. And yeah, he, he's always done that. So I think it's just. That's meaningful to me.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): That's so sweet.

>> Clare: I love that I'm so cute on so many levels.

Kailee and Hannah talk about being young adults in Episcopal Church community

So we're gonna transition into talking a little bit more about church life and community. I'm curious what it was. It's like being a young adult in your Episcopal Church community. It sounds like you grew up in pretty different, uh, styles, so to speak, of parishes, and yet you're both part of the Canterbury House. So, yeah, talk a little bit about Canterbury, but also talk about, you know, your experience with your Episcopal Church community in your own parishes. Hannah, we'll start with you and then go to Kailee.

>> Hannah Connelly: Uh, being a young adult in the church has definitely been a transition for me being a youth. I was growing up in a great youth program and I felt so supported and heard and empowered and all that. And a lot of that has carried over into my young adulthood. And especially in Canterbury. At Canterbury House, it's the young adult show. Like it's all about us and what we wanna do, we do. And I love that. And it does feel like a very.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Very.

>> Hannah Connelly: Good faith based environment that I can really do the hard work in and I feel comfortable doing it in. But in the broader church outside of our house, I think that being a young adult has come with some challenges. I don't think that it's always the easiest to be a young adult in the Episcopal ch. Think that sometimes we get overlooked or just, oh, uh, that's campus ministry, which I struggle with. And I.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Sorry.

>> Hannah Connelly: Um, I'd like to make more of a change along those lines because at the end of the day, it's on us to make the change we want to see. So at Canterbury House, I've been loving my young adult experience. But in church itself, I think it's easy to kind of be overlooked as young adults since we are such a small population. And there's more, but that's all I'll Say for now.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I mean, I think I've had the same experience as Hannah in the sense of Canterbury, where it's just like we kind of make our own decisions and well, I mean, obviously we have to run it by Karen. But like, we still have uh, a lot of, like, we get to experience the church on our own but with like, help, which I think is really nice. But I mean, I think once again Hannah and I had a very different experience because I knew no one outside of my church back in St. Uh, here in St. Louis. And I've noticed that all the other young adults in Kansas do know each other. But at my church it was a very, um, we have. The amount of young adults we have active at all the events that we do here is how many we have just at my church at home. And so like, we never like, branched out so very. It was just like very self sufficient. And I think we have very good mentors and stuff like that at my church that I can just, I don't know, talk to anytime. But it's. I think I've been supported by my, uh, the Episcopal Diocese of Missouri for my entire life. Um, and they've done a really good job of setting me up with my faith journey, considering they still have opportunities for me to come back and work on, uh, for mission trips and camps and stuff like that.

Do you feel like your voice is valued in your parish home

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Do you feel like your voice is heard or valued in your parish home.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Or like Canterbury Parish?

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): I think home parish. Home parish, but you can answer for both. I mean.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: My home parish, I'd say definitely, um, they do surveys to see. Like they send out surveys to the youth, they send out surveys to the parents. They send out surveys all the time, you know, and I think it's very easy. It's easier when there's uh, like all the priests and youth directors and stuff, have children too in the church because they want to know how they can better improve stuff. But I've always like, had questions or uh, not question. Like people have asked me questions as I became an adult, like this. Is this working? If you were younger, would this work for you? Like, stuff like that. And I think that's where my voice is heard. And I think that's a really beautiful thing.

>> Hannah Connelly: Hannah, I'm gonna go ahead and say yes and no. Um, typical.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Typical Episcopalian. Yes and no.

>> Hannah Connelly: Yes and no. In some ways it's such a yes. Like they're so great. I'm on the youth and Young Adult task force where I feel like I am able to make a change within our diocese and My voice is heard there. And as a delegate at convention, I believe that that is such an amazing opportunity that us young adults get, um, especially through the Canterbury Houses, as we are our own little parishes. But. And I think it's just the nature of being a young adult and not necessarily being able to kind of station yourself in one parish or that's something that I haven't really been able to do. I believe that that just kind of makes it, uh, harder for your voice to be heard when you're kind of all over the place in your own personal life. And that is just the nature of being a young adult is not really knowing what's going on, ever. Which, then you go to church and they realize that. So maybe, uh, my voice isn't the number one or like a go to. But I feel like in a lot of ways, yes. And in growing up, I was so empowered to use my voice, and I still work to use my voice, but I think in other, in other spaces within the church, it can be a little bit harder for our voices to be spotlighted or listened to.

>> Clare: As I'm hearing you both talk, one of the things that I've thought about is I'm playing devil's advocate here. Ish. Maybe I'm not in trouble.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Doesn't need an advocate. Claire.

>> Clare: I'll ask for prayers later. But I'm. I'm wondering if one of the reasons why the young adult voice hasn't necessarily gotten as much attention, particularly college and post college young adults, like within the first two years or so, is because it's a transient period of your life. It's. It's a constant cycle. So why would we put more resources and time towards it? And I'm not saying that we shouldn't because I, I absolutely love this community. I, I think more resources need to be put towards it on a very big level. But I, I've oftentimes wondered that, and I'm starting to pick up a theme here, particularly in the parish level. So just my two cents. As I'm hearing you, you all talk. I'm curious though, in light of that, uh, have you been involved in any ministries or retreats or Episcopal youth, young adult programs outside of Canterbury, specifically, because we know that Canterbury is, uh, a campus ministry offering that you guys have been a part of. What those youth, young adult programs were and what, what was it like for you to be involved in them and any meaning that comes up for you about participating in them?

>> Hannah Connelly: I love retreats or extra events like you were describing, Claire. I think that they. I think in today's world it's so hard to put your faith first when your attention is being pulled at by your phone all the time or by the million other things or your academics or whatever drama is going on in your personal life. Personal life. But when you are able to take yourself out of that and into a meaningful faith based community, I think that there is such value to that that we don't always consider as young adults, we got so much to do. Why would I take myself out of my, my schedule to spend time with God when I have finals coming up? But uh, we did a young adult retreat my freshman year with Ken and Lisa Sanuda and that was just so rejuvenating. And I love times where I'm able to connect with other young adults in a faith based way because you just don't get many opportunities to deeply connect with people because spiritual conversations in themselves are deeper and they allow you to see person to person, which I believe we're longing for in this very technologically advanced world that we just don't connect with people as we should. So every, I've done quite a few retreats or staffed youth events and having that community is just such a blessing and it's something that I really hope that I could continue to make time for in my life and I hope that I will continue to make it a priority because I think that is so important to our developing faith and doing the work and our relationships with God.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I'd say for me, I think at my church we have a lot of things that are offered and you know, there's a lot of just things offered in general in all the churches that I've ever been to. Um, you know, but I, I love that my, so my youth to minister at my church at home. She hosts a lot of events at her house or stuff like that. For example, I mean this 31st she's hosting, um, a little lunch for all of the graduated seniors and young adults, I guess for all of us just to have lunch with her and connect with each other again because we all kind of fall out for a bit. And I think having those connections when we do come back from school is very important and it helps us keep our faith because a lot of us will fall out of religion when we go to college or when we come back from college because you're like, oh, I'm not at school anymore, I don't have to keep going to church. Or it's the opposite of I'm not home anymore. I don't have to keep going to church. So I think or they struggle to find a church. And I think it's great to get to connect with my old friends again. And I know a lot of them, a lot of my friends will struggle with finding churches at school, specifically Episcopal churches.

>> Clare: And they're.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: And they don't want to go try a different church, you know, um, because they, they, they don't. They all really like high holy church, like I do. And so if they go to a church that isn't high holy, and they're like, what is this? You know, Because a lot of us are cradle Episcopalians, so I think events like these are important to help find, you know, help each other find stuff and just to reconnect.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Yeah, I think, like, it can just be so hard. Like your church home is, it's called home because it's like, it feels like home. And then, you know, even if you go to another Episcopal church, even if it is high church and similar to what you had at home, like, it still isn't necessarily gonna feel like home because it's not. It's different people, and there may be little things that are different and that can be really hard when you make that transition and you're not close to your home church anymore. So you said that. And now in my mind, I'm like, ooh, should I be, like, hosting a dinner over Christmas break for people? Okay. Uh, Hannah's like, I think you should.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I think you should, especially for your seniors out there too, you know.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Well, I moving m on from more work for me. Uh, no, but that'd be so fun to get everybody together, like, anyway. Sure. Having any kind of relationship is difficult. And so a relationship with the church, a relationship with God is no different. There's gonna be tensions and challenges.

Kaylee says she has some struggles with the Episcopal Church

So is there something that you feel like you struggle with about the chur or about your faith? Kaylee's nodding, so I'll invite her to go first.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Yeah, I definitely have some struggles not with my faith. My faith is very strong and rooted pretty deep. More with just the church in general. I, I think I've always, you know, the church is never going to be perfect because it's man made. Um, it's not something, obviously, if it was made by God, it's made in God's image, but it's not made by God. So it's not going to be perfect. And it's going to have its flaws. I, I, uh, do struggle with churches that don't take it serious or that their money isn't being used in a correct way and that aren't looking to better their church constantly. Because I think that every church can constantly be improving and learning from their mistakes and what they can do better. And I think there's. I've been to quite a few churches that haven't wanted to grow, haven't wanted to continue to learn what they can do better or hear feedback. And I think that's a big problem that I struggle with about the church, is that they don't want to hear any criticism a lot of the time, because, you know, it's all, uh, none of us want to hear criticism ever. But I think when you're. It feel some people will feel like you're attacking God if you're attacking the church. But I don't see it as an attack. I think I. Anytime I mention, uh, something I don't like about the church or something that could be improved, it's always out of place of. I think we could grow together and make a more inclusive environment, especially in like, around politics and stuff like that in the church. I haven't. I, uh, struggle with that. But I think it could be a lot more direct and clear that we do accept every one of all race, gender, you know, political views, everything put aside. We're all God's children. And I think that's where some churches struggle, and that's where I struggle with the church.

>> Hannah Connelly: My passion is, and, um, probably will continue to be children's youth ministry and leading into young adults. It makes me very sad when I see churches who maybe don't have a strong youth presence be like, well, we don't. We're not gonna. We're not gonna. That's. That there's no youth presence here. Or just having youth that don't feel scooped up and loved by their church and supported and children's programming as well, like. Well, that. I think that that is where catching them early and loving them and showing them God's love and having that safe place for questioning. And because that's my favorite thing about growing up in the Episcopal Church was that questions were always encouraged, not even allowed, but really encouraged in a very critical way. I think that having that from a young age is so important for your faith and knowing that thinking critically about it is a good thing. So whenever I see churches that maybe don't have a great youth, young adult presence, that kind of makes me sad. And I wish that there was more that we could do about that. And I think that as a young adult, entering an Episcopal church is hard because you don't see yourself, you don't see other people. A lot of strong presence of other young people around, and that could just lead to you feeling, like, a little bit not welcome, even though you are welcome. It's the Episcopal Church. That's the number one thing that I tell people, is that you are welcome. But when they don't feel like there's a space for you, it's hard to continue to come back. So that's what I'd say.

I'm curious if you've ever felt obligated to defend your Christian faith

>> Clare: So one of the things that is. Is part of being a Christian, um, is that there's a social implication of being a Christian. And I'm curious if you've ever felt like you had to defend your faith or distance yourself from it in a public or online capacity, like through social media, if you were to say, I don't know, something about your faith or you see something about something related to the church and you say something or someone says something.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Uh, yeah, I have definitely had to defend myself and my faith, uh, especially being a gay Christian in the Episcopal Church, because people are always just like, well, you can't be gay and a Christian. I'm like, says who? You know, So I do have to defend myself in that sense. And then I do think with certain friends or friend groups, I do have to distance myself from my faith a bit, which is really hard for me because, like, a lot of the time, if my friend's struggling with something, I'm just like, well, blah, blah, blah. And then I'm like, oh, wait, I can't say that because, you know, or the advice I would want to hear is different than the advice my friends will tell, you know, and so I feel like sometimes I do have to distance myself, but also at the same time, I'm defending myself all the time.

>> Clare: Yeah.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: With just being, once again, a gay Christian. But I think I hold my own. So.

>> Hannah Connelly: I have found myself in tricky positions or defending my faith or even out of my sake, maybe not putting it as outwardly because I'm concerned on how that would look or what people would think of just a Christian if I don't have time to explain the whole thing. But I feel like today Christianity could be associated with a lot of things that I do not feel are very Christian. And that's something that I've struggled with, you know, being as we all worship the same God and are pulling from the same scripture, that what. What differentiates me? How can I. How can I put myself in a different space than these other people and make that known to people so that they don't associate me with the people I don't want to be associated with. So, uh, it is hard, but it's. I just always like to emphasize, like, the God's love. And if I, If I, uh, do find myself saying, like, I'm Christian or whatever, I like to follow it up with a little snippet about what I believe because there are so many different branches of Christianity in today's day and age that I feel like that snippet is very important to me.

>> Clare: Yeah, I love that you, um, you touched on that, Hannah, that the diversity of thought and practice within the Christian faith, and yet we all say that we are loved and carried and saved by God. I wish more people had that kind of wisdom and insight. To the. To the. Yes. And to recognize that someone who has a fundamental difference in their thought and practice within the Christian faith is still a sibling in Christ, full stop. And that's the great and challenging beauty of being a Christian within the Christian family, I should say.

>> Hannah Connelly: Amen.

Is there anything you do to maintain a spiritual life outside of regular worship

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): So worship is obviously a great way to connect with your spiritual life. But, uh, are there. Is there anything you do to maintain a spiritual life outside of regular worship? Kaylee's nodding.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: So yeah, yeah, definitely. Obviously one. I live in the Canterbury House, which you m. Know, we have a chapel there. We have weekly programs and, you know, living with people who are also faith driven, like with the same faith, and is very different and helps me maintain my spiritual life. But also I'd say my family is a big factor too. With every single day, my dad in our family group chat will send a quote or a prayer in the group chat. You know, it's just like random. It's random things like that where we all will send like a picture of something beautiful and be like, remember, this is God's country and we're just living on it. And I, Yeah, just little things like that. And I, I love to, when I'm on drives or anything, just look at how beautiful everything is. And I love to just admire my friends and the people around me and just even random people. I was just like, wow, this is someone that God has created and they are beautiful. I also, anytime I'm just like mad or anything too. I'm just. I just like, take a second and I'm like, is this really worth being mad about? Or like, what am I doing? You know, it's just. And then I'll just also pray to God, be like, hey, can you please help me with this? Can you help me with patience? And, you know, I know a Lot of people say the one thing you shouldn't pray for is patience because it'll hit you like a truck. And trust, it has, it has every single time. But it has, it has shaped me and helped me to be as patient, as patient as I am with people.

>> Hannah Connelly: I'm just going to be echoing a lot of things that Kayleigh said, but I think that uh, God is nature. And whenever I have an opportunity to reconnect with nature or sit there in God's creation, that is really meaningful for my faith. And I'm really drawn to water. So I like to find myself near a body of water and just sit in prayer. My main way that I keep up with my spiritual life outside of worship is through prayer. I just love to think about my prayers as just a conversation with my best friend Jesus. I like to picture him sitting at the foot of my bed as I'm falling asleep and I'm just like, let me tell you, I need help. Here's what's going on. If you could kind of offer me some guidance here or. I just, I love feeling safe in my prayers to just be there with the presence and listen to what God is telling me back or you know, listen the following days and see what he's trying to tell me. So yeah, really prayer and especially in maintaining relationships, my especially my God centered ones. Like Kaylee was saying, living in a Canterbury house, it's just such a once in a lifetime, beautiful opportunity to live with people that you love and also love Christ. That's just been such a blessing for me.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): So, yeah, uh, I love that you both talked about community and like familial support and surrounding yourself with other people who are believers that um, so much of what the church is about. So it's great to hear that that is connecting with you.

Kayleigh says outreach toward youth is what grows the Episcopal Church

What do you guys have any hopes for the future of the Episcopal Church? Kayleigh?

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I mean what Hannah preaches all the time is, you know, youth I think. Obviously I think youth is very important. I think it's the big, uh, it's the most important part about any church is the youth because it's what actually grows the church. Mostly without youth you don't have the future of the church that you have. And so I, I hope to see more, more care going into our youth and youth programs, um, across the country really in all churches to not just the Episcopal Church, but every church. I think youth pro. Our youth programs in all aspects can always be better. And outreach towards youth and outreach towards anyone, honestly I think is, you know, big Part because, you know, it's. How are you. How are you gonna grow a church without the people?

>> Hannah Connelly: You know, I think that our church does such a good job at saying that the youth are our future and talking about it, but I would love to see more manifestations of that and outreach, um, as a whole, not only to youth and young families, but outreach to all people and kind of making ourselves known are. We are powerful. We're with each other. We are a community of people who can make change and making ourselves known. I had trouble with this word evangelize. You guys know what I'm trying to say? But doing that in a way that doesn't scare us as Episcopalians. I would love to see more of. But, yeah, just more growth and outreach and scooping people up, especially our youth and young adults and children.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): That's the second time you said that. And I love that. Scooping people up. Like, I love it.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: I mean, yeah, to build off what Hannah said about, you know, more outreach and evangelizing. Um, I think, although the Episcopal Church already does a really good job with, like, mission trips and stuff like that, I think our acts of service is what draws in the biggest amount of support and people, and seen that with a lot of churches as well, is that more people. I've seen a lot more people want to, like, find interest in the Episcopal Church and stuff through the acts of service that we do. So I would love to see more Episcopal churches adopt the, um, like, mission trip. I know there's a lot that already do, but, uh, mission trips and just hosting events, because, like, my church every Sunday does, um, meals at the homeless shelter. Cooks, uh, meals for every single resident in the homeless shelter. And, you know, if we put more money into doing stuff like that, that would be beautiful as well. Um, because that also because I've had, like, very deep and meaningful, powerful conversations with people who are, um, in homeless shelters, and they're just like, can you just pray for me? Like, I need that. I need. I don't have time to go to church. I don't have, you know, so getting people connected like that, I think that would be important to see in our future as well.

>> Clare: So we're talking about the future. We're talking about growth. We're talking about invitation, uh, hospitality. What would you say to someone your age who's curious about faith but hesitant to walk into a church?

>> Kayleigh McDonne: You know, anytime I have friends or anything that are like, oh, I like, I believe in God, I believe in Jesus, but I don't really like the church But I kind of want to go. I'm just like, what's the worst that can happen? I know it's not probably the best advice, but it's gotten a lot of my friends to try church. And going back to church, I'm just like, well, like, what are you even worried about? Like, what's the worst that's gonna happen? I go to this church. You. You love me, like, you care about me. You know, I have good opinion. Like, you know my opinions on stuff. Like, and if I love this church so much, what's, like, the worst that's gonna happen to you? Like, I know you've, like, a lot of people have passed, like, religious traumas or something like that, and I'm just like, yeah, but I'm. I'm gay. I go to this church. I promise you, like, if anything happens that's really bad, please tell me and I will, like, talk to this church. Like, come on. Like, um, and so it's not. It's definitely not the best advice that I could give. You know, I could be like, well, you could save yourself. Save. You know, But I just like to make it more chillax and chill, because people our age just like to hear dog, come on, what's. What's gonna happen, you know, versus a whole sit down. That's so. Yeah, that's how I like to invite people to go to church and stuff.

>> Hannah Connelly: Whenever I find myself in these conversations, I always invite them to come with me because I think that having someone, you know, just makes it so much less intimidating. And I think that's one of my biggest jobs as a peer minister, is to, you know, help people come into the church environment, or if the church environment's, you know, a big step, then just come to Canterbury. Just come eat dinner with us. But I would also encourage them to try out different churches if that's something that they're longing for, because there are so many different ways to worship and so many different branches that worship differently than us. And while I, uh, would love to bring you into the Episcopal Church, there are different shoe sizes for everyone. Like, we could be a different fit for a different person. So just talking about, you know, encouraging them to pray about it if they do already have that, ah, you know, calling and see where. Where they end up and see if they want to come with me is always what I. I strive to do.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): This was all so beautiful, and I'm so appreciative for you guys coming on the podcast and sharing your thoughts.

Before you go, we have a surprise Rapid fire section for you

Um, before you go, we have a surprise Rapid fire section for you. Six questions. You can give just a one word answer, no explanation. It's a this or that kind of thing. Okay? So un. So unmute yourselves and prepare for rapid fire. Rapid fire response. This is. We do this at the end of every podcast. All right.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Gosh, I need to start listening through the entire podcast.

>> Clare: Okay, I was ready.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): I was ready.

Choose Scripture, tradition or reason for All Things Episcopal Podcast

All right. High church or low church?

>> Clare: Favorite part of the liturgy? Church service. Favorite part of the church service?

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Eucharist. Communion. Communion.

>> Hannah Connelly: Yeah, communion.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Scripture, tradition or reason?

>> Clare: Pick one.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): The expression on their faces right now, y', all, like, it's really insane. This is not a visual podcast.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Um, tradition.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): I don't know.

>> Hannah Connelly: Investment color.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Hannah didn't answer. No.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Reason.

>> Hannah Connelly: I said reason.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Oh, okay.

>> Clare: We have reason and tradition.

>> Hannah Connelly: Got it.

>> Clare: Investment color. You vibe with most.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: What are the colors?

>> Hannah Connelly: Red is purple. Green is ordinary time. That's what I got. Red is Pentecost. Pentecost.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): White is like feast days, like Easter and weddings. And would you rather Easter vigil or Christmas Eve?

>> Clare: Christmas Eve church potluck must have chili.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Rapid fire answers.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: First thing come to your mind.

>> Hannah Connelly: A, uh, cookie.

>> Mother Karen (The Reverend Karen Schlebach): Perfect. There you have it. Thanks again, Hannah and Kayleigh, for joining us today. We really appreciate your time and insight.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Thank you.

>> Clare: Hey, friends, thanks for listening. Please like and subscribe and leave a review wherever you listen to podcasts. To learn more about All Things Episcopal on the Diocese of West Missouri's communication pages, Please visit dio westmo.org backslash podcasts backslash and in the Diocese of Kansas, please visit edokformation.WordPress.com All Things Episcopal Podcast All Things Episcopal Podcast is a production of the Diocese of West Missouri and the Diocese of Kansas in association with Resonant Media.

>> Kayleigh McDonne: Sam.